How to Stay Happy in Life (with the Help of Stoic View)?

Generally, Stoicism is a school founded in Athens by Zeno of Citium. The stoic view as identified by Epictetus identifies the strategies of gaining happiness in life by flowing with what comes naturally to us.

Epictetus noted that there are two constants in life those within our power and those not in our power. We control our power ourselves by our impulses, opinions, desires, and aversion.

While the other conditions are things not under our power such as status, reputation, and possession which are influenced by the material world.

The key to happiness as identified by Epictetus is to seek what is within our power and averts what is not within our power to gain.

Powerful Forces Behind Happiness

Epictetus was saying that the things which are in our power are naturally free, unimpeded, and unhindered. Although, those not within our power are slavish, hindered, weak, and belong to others.

Those who seek what is within their control find no fault with others or hindered by anyone as they act on their will, and no harm can come unto them.

How to Live Happily?

Happy smile

Assignment services have stated for the desires of a man to seek things beyond themselves end up not gaining what they want and lose what they need to be happy.

In pursuit of material happiness, we lose ourselves as things that are not ours, start to rule us. By analyzing a situation of whether it is within our power or not we can determine what the next course of action will be.

Also, by shunning events or circumstances, not within our power, we can live a happy life that does not depend on others.

Epictetus identifies that an individual who fails to gain what they desire is unfortunate, but those who fall into what they seek to avert are miserable.

So those who seek to avoid that which is not in their control such as death or sickness feel miserable. It identifies that as individuals we should restrain our desires. But at the same time not seek to avert that which we cannot control but that which we can control.

Epictetus, therefore, defines that we should desire that which is within our power to gain while rejecting those not within our power.

Epictetus identified for example “So if you are fond of an earthen pot, say, ‘I am fond of an earthen pot.‘ Then you will not be upset if it breaks”. This identifies our need to restrict ourselves from things we have no control over.

How Unhappy People Live

Happy and unhappy smile

I agree with Epictetus’s view of gaining happiness in that the unhappy people in our current world are those who desire that which is not within their power and fail to seek for things within their power.

An example is the current social trends in which persons seek to have as many followers or fans on various social media platforms. Especially seeking among the youth which leads them to frantically seek ways of getting more people.

Happiness for the average youth today is getting the most “likes” on a picture or the most followers.

This constant need for attention which is beyond the control of individuals. It leads to misery and self-loathing as such individuals lack confidence in themselves as they seek validation from others.

Epictetus identifies that matters such as the status of things when others control it.

Moreover, that would lead to an unhappy life if we sought to gain that which belongs to others.

 

Related Article:  How to Quit Your Boring Life & Feel Happy

 

Human Nature

Today we rely so much on others and what is outside of our power to control that we are unhappy. Even for those who have they still compare themselves to what others have or those who have more.

Even when we get wealth or status, we still desire to gain more, and this is the source of suffering and unhappiness.

What Do People Seek?

Happy couple

We seek which we do not control more than that which we have control over.

For example (as Epictetus defined), it’s important to control our desires in situations where one is going for an interview. They should tell themselves they have control over what they say.

However, getting a job is not their decision to make. We should restrict ourselves to those things we can achieve with our power.

Epictetus identifies that uneducated people blame others for their failures while those who have begun learning blame themselves.

Although, for those who learning is completely to blame neither others nor themselves.

I believe this line of thought by Epictetus is a powerful reflector of the society in which we seek to blame others and ourselves for matters which are out of our control.

Example Illustrations

For example, the terrorist attacks in countries such as the United States will see others blaming the security officials, themselves for allowing people to live in their society and the government for allowing it to take place.

However, for those who understand that there are things that we cannot control do not blame themselves or others. Instead, seek to create measures to address the issue.

Epictetus further identified that in case anything that should happen to an individual, it’s the responsibility of that person to turn to himself.

Find the capacity to deal with the situation. This notion identifies that the solution to our problems lies with us and not with anybody else.

So only we hold power to our happiness.

Nursing Experts state that happiness in this life is simply embracing who we are individual and seeking to achieve. More often, that’s within our abilities or power and forsaking that which we cannot control.

I argued that in society we tend to seek what others have. We live in an unhappy society ruled by how we view others and how others view us.

Conclusion

We have become dependent on others for our happiness. This phenomenon has led to misery as others cannot always measure up to what we expect of them.

Happiness comes from within that is from understanding our desires, our strengths, and our limitations.

We thus achieve happiness when we understand our role and circumstances in life are based on two contexts of control.

Happiness is letting things happen regardless of what we like. This defines that the path to happiness is accepting all that happens whether good or bad and not letting them influence who we are individuals.